NorthStar Church Blog

What does it take to have a marriage that you don’t have to endure but that you can actually enjoy? In the very first book of the Bible, Genesis, God tells us we shouldn’t be alone. There are six keys to what we could and should be doing in our marriage.

1) Communicate. We’ve got to talk to our spouse. In this busy world, we don’t have a lot of time to sit down, talk face to face and have a heart to heart conversation. We need to work at it. When you are talking, really listen. Try to understand what’s going on with your spouse. Make sure your spouse has first place in your life and has complete access to you.

2) Consideration. Show your spouse common courtesy. Think of the other person’s need before your own. Pay attention to the other person’s wants and needs. Do what you used to do when you were dating to make them feel special and loved.

3) Compromise. It’s unloving to be unyielding and immovable. You are two parts trying to work together towards one whole. You need to appreciate your differences. You have to be able to give and take. You need to come to agreement on how your family will work. The joy in marriage comes in giving of yourself to your spouse.

4) Courtship. If there was more courting in our relationship, there would be fewer relationships in court. Over the years, it gets harder and harder to date your mate. Try new things together. The grass isn’t always greener on the other side of the fence even though a lot of people think it is. Where you choose to water it, the grass gets green. Water your own relationship by courting.

5) Commitment. Divorce is a breaking of trust because you promised before the Lord and your spouse that you were committed. God knows the pain divorce causes in lives. It causes pain between children and parents. We live in a world where divorce is easy. Make it not an option. You will never have the relationship you want if you are not committed. There are no two people in the world that can’t be compatible if they put their minds to it. Love is a choice. It takes time and you have to work at it.

6) Christ. Christ changes everything. Jesus still loves us unconditionally. We’re to love our spouse like Jesus loves us. Only Christ can change your heart. Put Christ first in your lives.

Decide what memories you want to leave behind for your spouse and children when you die. Write down what you want to be remembered for and then LIVE IT.

Make God #1 in your life because He is the glue that keeps it all together. Take the word “Divorce” out of your vocabulary. Start compromising and stop demanding your own way. Renew your commitment to your marriage vows.

As any parent of young children knows, it is easy to find things to worry about. We worry about how they will do academically and socially in school, how we can keep them safe and how we can keep them healthy. For Christian parents, there is an even bigger worry- will they eventually step across that line of faith on their own and accept Christ as their Savior? We do our best by taking them to church, reading the Bible to them, talking to them about Jesus and praying for them, and we are blessed when we see signs along the way that reassure us that they are on the right path. Below is an example of one of those “signs”:

It was a typical evening in the Burke house- Typical in every way except that instead of the typical soundtrack from “Annie” or the typical Alvin and the Chipmunks Christmas CD sounding upstairs, there was worship music. This was not so typical.

If you are interested in attending the next service, I have no idea when it will take place, although I have been told the band will be practicing on Friday nights.

God says there are five ways to bring out the best in anyone you have a relationship with. We need to:

1) Accept their uniqueness. Our society follows complacency and values sameness. One of our greatest challenges as parents is to teach our children to value their uniqueness. God loves diversity. If everyone was the same, a lot of vital things would remain undone. We have to teach our children not to compare themselves to others so they can be proud of what they do. We often compare our looks, waist sizes and income but, if we compare ourselves to others, we can get discouraged or prideful. Plus it teaches our children the wrong values. Push your children in the way their natural talents and tendencies go. Encourage your children towards their natural gifting. God will ask you “Why weren’t you more like you?” It’s our responsibility to encourage and accept our children in their uniqueness.

2) Affirm their value. We have to teach our children that they have value based on what is inside of them and not how pretty they are or how great they play sports. Jesus died or them because they matter. God wants a relationship with them. They weren’t accidentally made. Our job as parents is to give our children self-esteem and self-worth. Communicate our affection through hugs and kisses. Our kids need lots of that. Give them that. Even if they’re older, continue to give them love, kisses and attention.

3) Trust them with responsibility. Give our children responsibility to bring out the best in them. We need to trust them. When we overprotect our children, it’s a form of rejection. You’re saying “I don’t trust you enough to handle this.” Do less for your kids and have them do more for themselves. When you take responsibility away from your children, you’re teaching them they don’t have to be accountable for themselves.

4) Correct them without condemnation. When you explode in anger, you feel release of emotions and you get instant results. Your child instantly behaves. Inconsistent parents produce inconsistent children. Wait. Try not to explode in anger. Watch your words because they can be like daggers in the little hearts of children. Correct without condemning them. When correcting, only correct the specific issue or situation.

5) Love them unconditionally. We learn this from our Heavenly Father. There’s nothing we can do to make God love us any less. We need to love our children the same way God loves us. Sometimes, we think our children are too far gone to find Jesus. God loves your children way more than you do. The worst sinner in the world is one bent knee away from salvation. It’s your responsibility to love your children, bring out the best in your children, to always be in their corner and to have their backs. That’s your job.

If Christianity doesn’t work at home, it doesn’t work. Be honest and transparent with your children. Tell them, “I want you to pray for me that I can be the parent that you deserve”. Tell your children when you mess up right when you do it and use it to teach them the right way to go.

Start a relationship with the Heavenly Father today. Treat your children and others the way Jesus treats you. Accept and honor your parents as God’s gift to you. Practice these five things in all of your relationships.

PALS
On Friday, October 19, PALS (Parents and Little Stars) are having an event at Tree Paad on Dix Avenue in Glens Falls at 11 a.m. This is a huge indoor play land the kids will love! Call Toni at 638-2330 or email at mamalyng@aol.com for more info on this event. PALS is open to parents with children four years of age and under and is a great way to meet people at NorthStar.

Spirit Park Clean Up
Our church-sponsored park on the corner of Moe Road and Clifton Park Center Road needs some fall cleaning. Feel free to stop by anytime and make it shine by pulling weeds and picking up debris.

Top Soccer
Add1 Youth Group will be working with Top Soccer for the next seven weeks, Saturdays at the Clifton Commons Soccer Field, from 12:30 p.m. to 1:30 p.m. teaching boys and girls who have mental and physical disability how to play soccer. For more information or to get involved, contact grantley@northstarchurch.com

Men’s Paintball
On Saturday, October 27, at Agape Farms in Corinth, join us for some paintball fun! Meet at 8:00 a.m. in the church office parking lot and caravan up to the site. Cost is $55/person. Bring extra money for lunch. Contact Chris Litchfield at 373-5908 or litchfield30@aol.com with questions. Sign up at the information table.

50’s Sunday
On Sunday, October 28, it’s 50s day at NorthStar Church! Come to church dressed up in 50s attire. Prizes will be awarded to families and individuals who most look like the one in our series’ logo. Afterwards, join us for candy apples, popcorn and a bounce house. Invite your family and friends for this fun day!

We Recycle
If you don’t need your bulletin and pen for the rest of the week, please help us recycle it in the blue container at each exit of the auditorium. Thank you for helping us conserve resources.

It’s Sunday morning and the alarm clock rings. You cheerfully climb out of bed knowing you have plenty of time to get the family up, dressed, fed and off to church. All the while thinking, “Today will be different!” However, one thing after another begins to draw your attention away from the task at hand… preparing for church. After unloading the dishwasher, ironing a shirt or three, balancing your checkbook, and sorting the laundry, you look at the clock and suddenly you’ve got less than an hour to get out of the house and to church on time!

Each Sunday you promise yourself that you’ll be to church earlier, help with the set-up, and have some time to fellowship with other members and visitors. Yet, here you are again!

By now you’re completely stressed out, running around the house half dressed, hollering at the kids, changing their clothes once more as they’ve spilt orange juice and pancake syrup down the front of them, and failing in your attempts to get your husband out of bed.

FINALLY you get everyone out the door BUT, you and your spouse are no longer on speaking terms, the kids are fighting, someone’s crying and you’re still getting dressed in the front seat of the car! You pull up to the building, compose yourself, give the kids one final warning and make your way to the front door greeting everyone with a warm smile and a friendly hello!

Sound familiar? Maybe not, but I’m sure we all fall somewhere between the above mentioned family and the Perfects whom we were all introduced to in a video this past Sunday!

Would love to hear your Sunday morning stories! Or advice on how our Sunday morning routines can be more like that of the Perfects and less like the home of the Hyde’s (rather Jekyll/Hyde)!

Speaking of days gone by… On Sunday, October 28, it’s 50s day at NorthStar Church! Come to church dressed in 50′s attire! Prizes will be awarded to families and individuals who most resemble the family in our series’ logo. Following the service, join us for candy apples, popcorn and a bounce house!

Invite your family and friends for this super fun Sunday as we head back to the time of cashmere athletic sweaters, poodle and pencil skirts, pedal pushers, black leather jackets, rolled up jeans and t-shirt sleeves, bobby socks, catseye glasses… and for every hip 50′s guy, a comb!!

Get creative and see you in the 50′s!

We yearn sometimes for days gone by – a time where we had the chance to sit around the dinner table with each other, kids could play outside without fear and go to school without fear. There’s a yearning to get back to family. God says it’s not good for you to be alone. We need companions. We were created to have relationships.

A family is a shelter from storms. A home should be a refuge, a safe place, a haven of security. We may not always win but a family should put their arms around you to be with you and help you get through the hard times. Your family should love you and value you to help you get through the storms in life. Home should be a place of hope and hugs where people hear you and appreciate you.

A family is a center for learning. It’s supposed to be a training center that leads the children from being parental controlled to self-controlled to God-controlled. We parents are supposed to help our children through these phases. We need to help our children grow intellectually, physically, spiritually and socially. A large degree of happiness depends on how we get along with others, resolve conflicts and give out compassion. What are you going to pass to your children? God will hold us responsible for the values we pass onto our children. He is not optional. Make a list of values you are teaching your children and a list of what you should be teaching them.

A family is a place to play. Your home should be a place of fun. It’s not a boot camp. Lighten up and enjoy your home and your children. We only have them for a short time. If your children don’t view your home as a fun, safe place, don’t be surprised if they don’t return home often once they’ve grown. Make good memories. Have fun.

A family is a launching pad for ministry. Nothing will bond you closer together than serving the Lord together. God has left his wonderful message in our hands to spread His word to our children and with our children.

Three things to pray for:

Pray for your extended family (aunts, uncles, cousins, nieces, nephews)
Pray for marriages in our church
Pray for your NorthStar family.

Your next steps should be:

Take responsibility for your own and your family’s relationship with Jesus.
Lead the way for your family to be involved in a ministry
Intentionally teach your values and your faith to your children
Be a fun parent and offer hugs, hope and help

Lindsey Osterhout, October 1
Irene Stallmer, October 3
Gail Miles, October 4
Jessica Voos, October 10
Darin Dennis, October 13
Pam Wang, October 26
Doug Weber, October 30
Joe Gardner, October 29

Spirit Park Clean Up
Our church-sponsored park on the corner of Moe Road and Clifton Park Center Road needs some fall cleaning. Feel free to stop by anytime and make it shine by pulling weeds and picking up debris.

Top Soccer
Add1 Youth Group will be working with Top Soccer for the next seven weeks, Saturdays at the Clifton Commons Soccer Field, from 12:30 p.m. to 1:30 p.m. teaching boys and girls who have mental and physical disability how to play soccer. For more information or to get involved, contact grantley@northstarchurch.com

Taboo-Part 4 Sharing Your Faith
September 30, 2007

Heaven and hell weigh in the balance and people’s destinies are on the line. Why are we so hesitant to share our faith? There are three reasons why we’re so reluctant.

1) Fear. We’re afraid of what other people will think of us. We’ve bought into the myth of our culture that says everyone around us must approve of us. It’s driving people crazy trying to make everyone happy. The world doesn’t have the same values as Jesus does and as we Christians do. Look at the cross if you have any questions as to how the world treats believers. Don’t be afraid. Jesus gives us the power to overcome fear. Don’t be pious when sharing your faith. Just have honest conversations with people you care about. If you choose not to share the message, there is no other way it will be shared. If you choose to invest your life somewhere else, destinies are at stake. Share your faith and show your love to one person at a time. You don’t have to memorize the Bible to tell others about Jesus. You just have to tell others what joy Jesus has brought to your life. Don’t prejudge people because you think they don’t want to hear. Give them the opportunity to say yes to God.

2) Busyness. If we’re too busy, we don’t have time to tell others about God and we don’t have time to have God in our own lives. This busy life pushes God out and pushes our opportunities to share our faith out. You have to make sure you have room in your life for God. It takes time to develop relationships and you need to make the time.

3) Complacency. We don’t sense the urgency and we get stuck in our routine. Most of us go through life half-asleep. Right now, there are some people in your life that need you to wake up and feel the urgency to save their soul.

Here are four practical ways to share your faith:

1) Be baptized. You let everyone know that you are a follower of Christ. It’s a symbol of what’s happening in your life – that you’ve been raised to a new life.

2) Tell your story. The best messages in the world are personal messages. It’s the most sincere. You don’t have to live perfect but just be honest. Before you speak to anyone, say this phrase to yourself, “You matter to God”

3) Invite people you love to a Growth Group or to church. Most people will be honored to be invited and pleased that you want to share your spiritual life with them. Invite people to church so they can find a personal message.

4) Do what you love with non-believers. Use your hobbies as an opportunity to share your faith. Do it intentionally – surround yourself with non-believes so you can share the message. View your hobbies or your children’s extra-curricular activities as your mission field. Share your faith and love with others.